Independence from Past Regrets
July is a time for celebrating our independence. It can also be a time to reflect on claiming independence over those things in our lives that no longer serve us, and one of those would be past regrets.
There is no way around it, each and everyone of us has a past. Many positive events have occurred to shape us into who we are today. But how about the negative events? Could it be that those could serve us as well?
“The past has given you the strength and wisdom you have today...celebrate it!”
I love the daily cycle of the sun rising to begin each new day. It is as if the dark gives way to a guiding light that directs us to be renewed and begin again. Each day we have the opportunity to choose to move forward from our past regrets. Here are 3 suggestions that can direct you to a new path...
1. Acknowledge and accept it.
Yes, it happened. Yes, it is in your past. No, it doesn’t define you and it does not have to guide or rule your future. It is healthy to grieve/reflect for a season, although don’t stay there. There is too much good ahead for that! Feel the hurt and let it go!Feeling it instead of hiding and covering it uptakes away its power. Then it isn’t the “boogyman” any more. It has a name and is manageable.
2 Take the lessons from the past and walk into your future.
Glean the good from every situation. Keep searching and dig like you would for hidden treasure. What did you learn from this past event? How can you use it to make your present and future the best it can be? Past events and regrets can serve us IF we do the work and allow it! Learn your lesson so you can move forward instead of revisiting the same situation and having to learn the lesson over and over again!
3. Choose to let the good in!
We all have heard to let the past go, although that is easier said than done. It is a choice (often moment- by-moment) at the beginning of learning this practice. Sharing your story with those that can learn from it can be helpful, but remember, everyone else involved has their own version of the truth. Each time you retell the story you are nailing another stake in the ground, making it a part of who you are. STOP HITTING THE REPLAY BUTTON and release that event. Just do not feed it. Make room for a NEW STORY - your BEST one yet! Get on a whole new wavelength and start with your words, because they have power! Instead of saying, “Guys always leave me” try “The guy who is right for me will stay!”
Make a conscious choice to say, “I choose to give this up as it doesn’t serve me” and immediately turn your thoughts to see the “good” you want/already have in your life. Simple things such as being appreciative for a hot shower or warm bubble bath. How about a fuzzy blanket on a cool night? Or an iced drink on a hot summer day? Be thankful for it! Look around. We are some of the most blessed people on the planet. Choose gratitude and allow the present good to roll in and crowd out any past regrets that no longer serve you and your new present path.